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Hi Beermates,
So I've been running some banner ads for the next few weeks. So far the Party Animals banner is coming in first with Attention Whore second and Tammy Faye and Alice Cooper a close third. Really, it could be anyone's game! To check out the oh so exciting banner race: log in, go to Gold Members Resources and hit Run or View Banner ads. (But please don't run anymore right now, k babycakes?)
--KFK

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I have been getting more attention from men since Iíve been wearing my new pseudo-Tina Fey/Hot Librarian glasses. Maybe I can just SEE them swooning now. :-)


2009-01-01 - 10:21 p.m.

Happy New Year, y'alls. Yeeeehaw! [gunfire]


December 31, 2008 - 1:02 p.m.

So yes, once again my point is I'm a whore.


Wednesday, Dec. 31, 2008 - 9:18 a.m.

U give Goth a Bad Name.


Wednesday, Dec. 31, 2008 - 7:31 a.m.

I like to picture him stealing it in a whirl of flying leaves and dirt, perhaps with a confused gopher nearby, pausing mid-chew on a turnip, to witness the frenzy. That differs from the account in the book.


December 29, 2008 - 3:12 p.m.


I think I'm full now.


Dec. 29, 2008 - 1:10 p.m.

But if I do that, how will I cadge the place to see what else I can steal avail myself to before the office closes down?


Monday, Dec. 29, 2008 - 7:48 a.m.

If it's all the same to you, I'd just as soon not do a retrospective of 2008, which changed the concept of "anal rape" to that of "annual rape."


Sunday, Dec. 28, 2008 - 5:43 a.m.

But Heat Miser's not gonna to play Sun City!


Thursday, Dec. 25, 2008 - 7:18 a.m.

Weekends solve everything.


Dec. 24, 2008 - 7:45 a.m.

Even Christmas crafters are feeling the pain of the recession.


Wednesday, Dec. 24, 2008 - 7:40 a.m.

Iím a-gonna break your thumbs, and poot on your crotch!


Tuesday, Dec. 23, 2008 - 11:35 a.m.

Or maybe they're getting ready to eat some altar boys or something. Because Christmas zombies really arenít that discriminating, I hear.


2008-12-22 - 2:52 p.m.

On Wednesday evening, whilst working the crossword and waiting for That Man to finish his shift and come collect me, I was also watching the wind and snow buffeting the palm trees, and reflecting upon the fact that buffeting does not normally occur in Las Vegas unless it's pronounced "buh-FAY-ing" and refers to going to the Rio and eating as many crab legs as you can before they notice that you're not sharing with the other diners.


Saturday, Dec. 20, 2008 - 5:24 p.m.

I then woke up at 4 am the next day (12 hours later), wearing my pajamas, mismatched socks, and one earring.


Friday, Dec. 19, 2008 - 7:42 a.m.

Trush is, I'm an equal opportunity whore.


Dec. 17, 2008 - 8:49 a.m.

I am not from that region, but I assume the "F" stands for "FUUUUUUUUUCK."


December 15, 2008 - 2:36 p.m.

Recently, I read Jen Lancaster's 2006 memoir Bitter is the New Black, a historical rundown of her start as a Veruca Salt-ish tool of The Man to her drop down the unemployment garbage chute by a trained squirrel named Kathleen.


Sunday, Dec. 14, 2008 - 2:02 a.m.

"Both food and a toy," said the spousal unit happily, as if in some way this was a good thing.


Saturday, Dec. 13, 2008 - 9:45 p.m.

Its true, my mom had offered her services, but since my momís idea of comforting is twelve hours of Gay Elvis Meets Star Trek stories and stories about strange improbable ghostly knocking sounds in the ceiling at 4 a.m., I decided to forgo my her offer.


2008-12-12 - 11:22 p.m.

"Bear?" I asked.

"Bear," he confirmed.

Uh oh.

Friday, Dec. 12, 2008 - 3:16 p.m.


ďSelf, tell your Hubster to put this pussy down his pants.Ē


Thursday, Dec. 11, 2008 - 7:32 a.m.

Grandma MacLeod sez, "There can be only one."


2008-12-10 - 11:19 a.m.

And there I was, dressed like some scraggly artist just stumbling out of their windowless, mouse-ridden garret full of unsold canvases. I think I was even wearing my terribly pretentious black knit beret.


2008-12-10 - 12:12 a.m.

I am highly disappointed in myself because I forgot the important work I wanted to discuss today, namely, "Julio!" -- the autobiography of Julio Iglesias.


December 09, 2008 - 2:28 p.m.

Motherfuckers.


Monday, Dec. 08, 2008 - 1:53 p.m.

They are just a bunch of embittered lifer deadwoods whose sole enjoyment in life comes from watching reality shows in order to feel better about existing in boxy, featureless post-war apartments poorly carpeted with discolored shag rug and hung with faded reproductions of Thomas Kinkaide paintings and posters of kittens hanging in there because Friday is coming. I assume.



December 08, 2008 - 1:49 p.m.


And then I had to go on stage immediately to perform in an Esperanto version of Hair.



Friday, Dec. 05, 2008 - 7:27 a.m.


Can I press it with my ass?


Thursday, Dec. 04, 2008 - 7:51 a.m.

Scotvalkyrie's been sick, and she feels pretty much like this . . .


Wednesday, Dec. 03, 2008 - 7:13 a.m.

It's our nautical tribute to winter. Or Israel.


December 01, 2008 - 12:40 p.m.

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