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Hi Beermates,
So I've been running some banner ads for the next few weeks. So far the Party Animals banner is coming in first with Attention Whore second and Tammy Faye and Alice Cooper a close third. Really, it could be anyone's game! To check out the oh so exciting banner race: log in, go to Gold Members Resources and hit Run or View Banner ads. (But please don't run anymore right now, k babycakes?)
--KFK

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I did feel pretty anxious at the first group meeting since everyone there actually reads REAL BOOKS and throw around famous author names like Carlos Castaneda, who, of course, I thought was the guy who won “Dancing with the Stars” last year.


2009-05-31 - 3:32 p.m.

It is probably about thirty-two years since I've pried open a maple seed and stuck it on the end of my nose to be Pinocchio.


Saturday, May. 30, 2009 - 9:05 p.m.

The spousal unit has greeted this suggestion with incredulity, as if I've made some sort of challenge to his manhood.


Thursday, May. 28, 2009 - 10:52 a.m.

She, incidentally, said, "This, too, shall pass." I imagine I could challenge that she was nowhere near being the first person to have said that, but, knowing her, she'd have retorted, "It's more true when I say it."


Saturday, May. 23, 2009 - 1:33 p.m.

“Make me two identical balls!”


Monday, May. 18, 2009 - 3:06 p.m.

I was done peeing long before I was done reading, but I didn't move till I was at the end and had butt-ring, a symptom that will follow in my wake forever.


Sunday, May. 17, 2009 - 11:04 a.m.

Two chockies does not a “box” make.


Friday, May. 15, 2009 - 8:31 p.m.

So talking about “it” in front of a group of people was pretty difficult, except of course when they applauded at the end…and then it kind of became like a “Lifetime Movie Special” starring Patty Duke as a triumphant mom at her first art show with the music swelling, as directed by Demi Moore.


2009-05-11 - 2:03 p.m.

Eventually, you've got to stop crying, get a mop, and clean up both the milk and the tears. It's kind of how I live my life.


Sunday, May. 10, 2009 - 12:10 p.m.

It may repel moles, but it doesn't do a damn thing for plush hedgehogs.


Friday, May. 08, 2009 - 5:56 p.m.

Goodbye, cruel, cruel, world.


Thursday, May. 07, 2009 - 3:37 p.m.

I will never know, and thus you've left me in perpetual torment.

I hate your guts.

Wednesday, May. 06, 2009 - 9:40 a.m.


I call this the 200$ facelift...


Sunday, May. 03, 2009 - 1:39 p.m.

Swine Flu? You goddamned pussy, you get your ass off that podium and shake some mother fucking hands, you coward!!!


Sunday, May. 03, 2009 - 1:36 p.m.

It's a good thing we eloped — we would have capsized any given house of worship or meeting hall.


Saturday, May. 02, 2009 - 8:33 a.m.

Fortunately, she squats on the Spousal Unit's side of the table, so if she does happen to accidentally park her butt on a plate, it would be his plate.

This being the case, my attitude is no harm, no foul. The spousal unit tends to take it a bit more personally.

Friday, May. 01, 2009 - 4:28 p.m.


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